1. You can't cross a bridge without slowing down or stopping.
2. You take a trip to Niagra Falls and find yourself picking
out lines.
3. You've lost count of the number of boats you have in your
garage and backyard.
4. You sign up for a TV cable company only after checking out
the quality of their weather channel.
5. You get excited instead of worried when you hear about tornado
warnings and flash floods.
6. You've gone boating in conditions where you normally wouldn't
go outside.
7. You find yourself seeking out dams and any other places with
moving water.
8. You've been known to "dry scout" creeks, picking
out lines and eddies (the neighbors think you're nuts).
9. All career, personal, and financial decisions are judged
by the criteria "How will this increase my paddling time?"
10. Your friends call you a "gear head" and you don't
understand what they mean.
11. You've toyed with the idea of just leaving your boat and
gear loaded on your vehicle.
12. You see locals like the guys in "Deliverance",
and they seem normal to you.
13. If you do a rain dance without the cumbersome hindrance of
clothing in the moonlight to Creedance Clearwater Revival for
mood music.
14. When the weather radio goes off at work, you start thinking
of reasons you "don't feel so well."
15. Your boat and gear costs more than your car.
16. When you hear about a guy in a skirt you think nothing of
it.
17. The waterproof packaging your food comes in is more important
than the food itself.
18. When you go shopping, Gortex stock goes up.
19. You can buy that new inflatable for with your REI rebate
check.
20. When the TV camera man films the "crazies" kayaking
the flooded creeks and you know all their names (and you wish
you were out there with them.)
21. You refuse the local paddle club officer nomination because
it would cut into your paddle time too much.
22. You stop to rubberneck at highway river crossings.
23. You buy new clothes, not by how good they look, but by how
fast they'll dry.
24. You have to take out a second mortgage to build a new boat
shed.
25. You have an old Grumman canoe on blocks in the front yard.
26. You haven't missed roll practice at the local YMCA in 3 years.
27. You divide your life into work days and river days.
28. The bars on your rooftop rack are wider than 8 feet.
29. You have the NRS and the NOC catalogs memorized.
30. You've ever wondered how many milk cartons you'd have to
save to make your own kayak.
31. You got a speeding ticket on U.S. 19 in W. Va. (M.B.)
32 You know three places to eat in Elkins W. Va. (M.B.)